• Skip to main content
  • Skip to footer
  • Home
  • About
    • MyPE Copyright Terms
    • Authors
    • Deals
  • Info
    • Accommodation
    • Classified Adverts
    • Directory
    • Essential PE Numbers
    • Flight Schedules
    • Forex Converter
    • PE’s Online Radio Stations
      • Algoa FM
      • Bay FM
      • iFM
      • Kingfisher FM
      • MannMade Radio
      • Madibaz Radio
      • Umhlobo Wenene
    • Podcasts
    • Shipping
    • Street Map
    • Tides
    • Ward Details
    • Ward News
    • Weather
  • Contact
    • Advertising on MyPE
  • Submit
    • Blogger
    • 5 Quick PE Questions
    • Entertainment
    • Events
      • Add your Port Elizabeth event
    • Letter to the Editor
    • Lost and Found
    • Movers and Shakers
    • News Article
    • PE Videos
    • Photographs
    • Recipes
    • Traffic Hooligan
    • Say NO
  • Dam Levels
  • Advertorial
  • Business
  • NMBRA
  • NMB Rates
MyPE

MyPE

Community Business Directory, Event Listings, News and Views from Gqeberha, Nelson Mandela Bay

Pucker Up Roland

20 April 2011 By Alan Straton

The love hate (or is it hate hate?) relationship between Roland Williams and The Herald is often cause for much merriment in my household and for reasons that will stay between Roland ‘Snookums’ Williams and I.

The latest Herald bashing of Herald reporter, Rochelle De Kock by Nelson Mandela Bay Municipality Communications Director Roland Williams, reported on in Monday’s Herald refers.

I relate this tale of forbidden love based on the antics of members of the ANC who, when given the chance to appear in the spotlight, think it is their duty to refer in a snide manner towards their ‘friends’ in the media, almost as if the media are on some secret list that, when enacted, will whisk said journalists off to a dark and cold gulag somewhere. Of course The Herald is the tallest poppy in the field and is continually sniped at.

I remember one seat squirming incident when Rochelle De Kock was ‘attacked’ by a loyal Summerstrand female ANC cadre for having supposedly abominable ethics – in fact the tone of this ANC ‘ladies’ voice was quite embarrassing for my sensitive ears. But, I digress.

I can only conclude that Roland’s measure of exposure for the ANC is based on column centimetre size and not really on the actual content.

Before we go on I need to remind you, Roland and all the ANC Ward Councillors and other loyal ANC members that I offered swathes of publication space to all caring Ward Councillors. My ‘pleading’ with ANC politicians to send MyPE their monthly Ward Reports for publication without going through the editorial mill was IGNORED time and time again.

The only people who took me up on the offer to publish Ward Reports happened to be hard working and forward thinking DA Councillors.

So in the interests of fairness and with young Roland’s measure of size uppermost in my mind see below for the ANC’s contribution to MyPE and the community of Port Elizabeth that MyPE serves:.

Roland’s attack on the The Herald for not giving sufficient good coverage to the ANC I can accept – he, like ‘His Master’s Voice’ is being a loyal member of his chosen political party and defending it to the death.

But, Roland’s attempt to soften the blow on Rochelle by playing “Rochelle and Roland sitting in a tree, K I S S I N G!” is not on.

Yup, you got it right, apparently after Roland kakked Rochelle and The Herald out he “….. hugged De Kock and kissed her on the cheek, despite her efforts to push him away.” mmmm Roland I never realised that you were a bit of a sexist womaniser – I can feel my libido rising at the mere thought of your sexual shenanigans.

The thought of a little bit of verbal S&M followed by the young communicator striking at his prey does make me feel a little defensive and quite shamefaced at also being a male; “Whatever happened to a bit of respect dear boy! You can’t go rushing for the gal like a bull in a china shop!”

When we go sailing over the ocean and there are only men on the yacht we have a saying; “There is nothing wrong with a bit of Viking love!” This is probably similar to what prisoners said to each other in the dead of a steamy Robben Island night – ask your older ANC members for confirmation Roland.

So Roland, fair warning, your sexist “Me Man, You Lover” display of S&M tendencies towards Rochelle has got me quite hot under the collar and in the interests of fair play (as between the DA and ANC) I feel it encumbent upon me to warn you well in advance; “Stock up on your sexiest mens fragrance from Edgars, because the next time we meet I expect you to also hug me and caress my manly cheek with puckered lips despite my weak verbal protestations to the contrary“.

A bit of Viking Love from your Sugar Daddy will put you in the right frame of mind I am sure.

On the other hand Roland always reminds me of “His Masters Voice” – always eager to protect his master to the death, a great communicator and quite naughty so to get the ball rolling ahead of our Viking Love encounter I sourced this great image below for you and I to share Snookums.

Roland and Alan balance male sexism and break away for a bit of Viking Love. Woof Snookems, woof!
The following two tabs change content below.
  • Bio
  • Latest Posts
My Twitter profileMy Facebook profileMy Google+ profileMy LinkedIn profileMy Flickr profileMy Pinterest profile

Alan Straton

Chief Cook, Bottle Washer and Broom Mechanic at MyPE
Passionate about Port Elizabeth and definitely NOT packing for Perth. Alan's ethos is epitomised in the words of Nelson Mandela; "I have fought against white domination and I have fought against black domination. I have cherished the idea of a democratic and free society. If need be, it is an ideal for which I am prepared to die." See more articles by Alan.
My Twitter profileMy Facebook profileMy Google+ profileMy LinkedIn profileMy Flickr profileMy Pinterest profile

Latest posts by Alan Straton (see all)

  • A Multi-Billion Rand Opportunity: Why High-Impact Events Are the Catalyst South Africa’s Economy Needs - 6 October 2026
  • Your Staff Are Already Using ChatGPT. Is Your Company Data Safe? - 6 October 2026
  • MEX26 Returns to Cape Town on 31 October with 12 Industry Leaders, SAMRO CEO Keynote and Four Days of FAME Week Africa Access - 6 October 2026
  • Designer Pool Covers Urges South African Pool Owners to Prepare for Summer Weather Conditions - 5 October 2026
  • BurnesSEO Launches Generative Engine Optimisation Service for South African Businesses - 5 October 2026

Filed Under: Editorial Tagged With: rochelle de kock, roland williams, the herald

Reader Interactions

Comments

  1. CFW says

    20 April 2011 at 2:13 pm

    Perhaps he got into politics with the wrong idea about a “chief whip” – not the same kind they have at adult world. 🙂

  2. Theking says

    20 April 2011 at 4:07 pm

    If Mr. Williams had half a brain, he’d probably increase his intellect and intelligence two-fold. Sadly, I’d still consider him an idiot…

  3. J9 says

    21 April 2011 at 9:24 am

    I think that he deserved a swift klap – sies, the cheek of it!

Footer

RSS Straton Electrical

  • Open Cycle Gas Turbine Usage
  • Flattening the curve – What Every Solar Installer Needs to Know
  • Why you shouldn’t leave a charger plugged in when not in use
  • How do I check if an Electrician is properly registered in South Africa?
  • Easy Electrical Troubleshooting for Humans
  • Water – If You Cannot Measure It Then You Cannot Manage It
  • Tips To Survive Loadshedding
  • Eskom’s Top 50 Electricity Saving Tips

RSS MyPE Business News

  • NMBBC On Budget 2025
  • Leading Business Minds Set to Headline Chambers Annual General Meeting
  • Bay of Opportunity Portal
  • Bay of Opportunity Ambassadors Programme to Promote the Bay and Attract Investment
  • 6 Decades of Trucking
  • Thermal Camera Installed at Redhouse Substation
  • Finalist in the 2025 South African Car of the Year
  • Joining hands to create a lasting impact to St Albans Primary School

RSS MyPR Press Releases

  • A Multi-Billion Rand Opportunity: Why High-Impact Events Are the Catalyst South Africa’s Economy Needs
  • South Africa’s da Vinci Journey Reaches a 20 Robotic-Assisted Surgery System Milestone
  • How International Medical Training Could Add Doctors to South Africa’s Healthcare System
  • Legal Times ZA: A New Home for South Africa’s Legal Insight
  • Most Downloaded Press Release Images – September 2026

How you may use MyPE content © 2026 MyPE · Gqeberha, South Africa | Privacy Policy | MyPE Ads and Media Kit