Great Scott but Herbst Spoilt a Good Party

Here I was looking forward to a big nosh up – I was gonna claim my kilogram of meat and drink until I saw the spirits fly (or was that fly until I saw the spirits drink?) after being told about the planned ‘M17 Spiritual Cleansing Piss Up’ by Terry Herbst.

I confess though that MyPE was also complicit in halting this drunken debauchery necessary to placate the spirits and shake road safety to it’s very core.

See: Call in the Sangoma’s Because Arrive Alive Sucks

At the time I saw the solution as follows:

All belief structure representatives should take part – sangoma, rabbi, priest, dominee, reverend, charlatan etc. In the interests of Ubuntu and nation building the adherents and congregants of each belief structure must cover the costs of the ceremony for each of their leaders and be invited to attend. At a crucial part of the proceedings a collection plate will be handed around to collect funds for past victims families or fix potholes or put up warning signs. Scones, brown bread and butter, Tea and Coffee is served.

Now wouldn’t THAT be more inclusive and open up more channels for dialogue between different groups?

Young Terry’s eagle eye on the purse of the ratepayer and Sangoma spoil sport antics swiftly came to the notice of the national and international press and bloggers alike with John Scott from the Cape Times having penned the following piece recently:

TRUST Terry Herbst to spoil a good party

Some 40 years ago, as Arts Editor of the Cape Times, he was rocking the local theatrical boat, and infuriating the arts establishment with his all too-honest reviews. In fact, after one particularly blunt criticism of a show in the Three Arts Theatre, Plumstead, the Quibell Brothers banned him from all further productions.

The Cape Times responded by boycotting the theatre, and after a while Terry was sheepishly invited back to do his damnednest which, to be accommodating, he occasionally did.

Now, at the age of 80, he is still shaking up the city of Port Elizabeth where for 15 years he has served as a councillor on the Nelson Mandela Metropolitan Municipality. His latest triumph has been the exposure of a plan to spend R130 000 on a socalled “cleansing ceremony” designed to reduce accidents on the M17 road to the Motherwell township.

Local sangomas informed the ANC councillors and municipal officials that ancestors living under the nearby Swartkops River were angry at all the deaths, and that the answer was a big party. Terry discovered that the budget for this event, to be met from the mayor’s discretionary fund, included R31 500 for the cows, sheep and goats to be slaughtered, R13 500 for five cases of brandy, five cases of gin and 30 cases of beer, and R30 000 for two marquees to seat 1 000 guests.

The giant braaivleis and drinks party was to have been held last Friday.

But Councillor Herbst immediately wrote a letter to Dr M E Chabula-Nxiweni, executive director of public health, calling for the cancellation of the party. He pointed out that while the wishes of the ancestors were to be respected, the ancestors were perhaps unaware that Port Elizabeth was undergoing a financial crisis and that R130 000 would be better spent eradicating a bucket toilet system near the M17 before the users themselves became ancestors.

A copy of Terry’s letter somehow found its way all round the world. Alistair Kerr, an old former resident of Port Elizabeth now living in New Zealand, e-mailed back that South Africa should not think itself unique in holding parties to placate roadside spirits.

He said: “We had a similar thing here some years ago. The main highway between Auckland and Hamilton was being four-laned. One stretch came close to the Waikato River. Local Maoris forced the government to do a similar thing because the new extensions would upset the taniwha — a mythical river beast, that no one has ever seen.”

Alas, the Port Elizabeth ancestors are likely to remain upset. Two days before Friday’s party, Dr Chabula-Nxiweni wrote to Terry to say that the “ceremony” had been cancelled.

I told Terry on Monday that I regarded him as a real party-pooper. “I’ve already been called that this past weekend,” he said happily.

“I wouldn’t be surprised if angry spirits now jump out from under the Swartkops River and cause motorists on the M17 to have even more accidents,” I said.

“It’s a risk we must be prepared to take,” he replied. He still thinks the planned consumption of nearly R14 000 worth of brandy, gin and beer in the interests of road safety is a world first.

But, thanks to Terry, we’ll now never know if slaughtering animals and getting drunk is the answer to South Africa’s high accident rate.

John Scott

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Alan Straton

Chief Cook, Bottle Washer and Broom Mechanic at MyPE

Passionate about Port Elizabeth and definitely NOT packing for Perth. Alan's ethos is epitomised in the words of Nelson Mandela; "I have fought against white domination and I have fought against black domination. I have cherished the idea of a democratic and free society. If need be, it is an ideal for which I am prepared to die." See more articles by Alan.

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