MyPE

Community Business Directory, Event Listings, News and Views from Gqeberha, Nelson Mandela Bay

The Night That Aaron Broke my Virginity

By

There I was sitting having a good chuckle at The Boardwalk Amphitheatre when that bloody bastard, Aaron McIlroy, picked on me saying; “You look like you are to Golf what Pavorotti was to …. to ……. to ……… gymnastics!”

I’ll have you know Mr ‘Not so Ruff and Tuff from the Bluff’ that Golf is for people who don’t know how to SAIL!

And there you have it Aaron pooped my cherry twice:

  • I broke my virginity by attending a live McIlroy show and
  • He is the first comedian to ever point the finger at me (fat head!).

The Longhair and I popped along to see Aaron’s show, Unplucked, at the Boardwalk last night and were pleasantly surprised at the turnout – in comparison to our last comedic adventure with David Newton who had a pretty dismal crowd pop down to watch him. At least on that occasion it twas I pointing the index finger at the comedian and NOT the other way around – bloody fat head!

Inevitably comparisons abound between the two comedians and they boil down to:

  • McIlroy was far more slick and prepared
  • Newton was manic and didn’t rely on props
  • McIlroy had a visible structure
  • Newton appeared to bounce around.

Have a look at Mcilroy’s alter ego VJ chatting about body language below:

The highlights of the show for me:

  • The Bjorn van Rensburg character – if you have ever done National Service you will wet yourself – I even got some fist to fist action from Aaron during this skit when Aaron takes on an Alien.
  • Laverne, Laverne, Laverne – watching Aaaron try to tone down his signature male hip thrust move for this female character was too much, AND, seeing one of the male audience members looking intently at the ground and squirming with discomfort whilst Laverne stalked the open area cracked me up no end. My advice – if you have issues with your sexuality Boet, then rather stay at home.
  • Elvis impersonation by the character VJ – ‘A litle less conversation, a little more action’ had me very upset that the Apprentice Longhair had not accompanied us as we are little Elvis fiends that cut quite a fine show on the dance floor.

By the way if you go to the show which runs until Saturday 29 January then make sure that you hone up on these lyrics, take your dancing shoes (and partner) and give it a full tonk:

Elvis – A Little Less Conversation

A little less conversation, a little more action please
All this aggravation ain’t satisfactioning me
A little more bite and a little less bark
A little less fight and a little more spark
Close your mouth and open up your heart and baby satisfy me
Satisfy me baby

Baby close your eyes and listen to the music
Drifting through a summer breeze
It’s a groovy night and I can show you how to use it
Come along with me and put your mind at ease

A little less conversation, a little more action please
All this aggravation ain’t satisfactioning me
A little more bite and a little less bark
A little less fight and a little more spark
Close your mouth and open up your heart and baby satisfy me
Satisfy me baby

Come on baby I’m tired of talking
Grab your coat and let’s start walking
Come on, come on
Come on, come on
Come on, come on
Don’t procrastinate, don’t articulate
Girl it’s getting late, gettin’ upset waitin’ around

A little less conversation, a little more action please
All this aggravation ain’t satisfactioning me
A little more bite and a little less bark
A little less fight and a little more spark
Close your mouth and open up your heart and baby satisfy me
Satisfy me baby

Tickets for this limited season of Aaron McIlroy’s Unplucked are R100. Performances start at 8pm. Tickets at the door and Computicket.

The following two tabs change content below.
My Twitter profileMy Facebook profileMy Google+ profileMy LinkedIn profileMy Flickr profileMy Pinterest profile

Alan Straton

Chief Cook, Bottle Washer and Broom Mechanic at MyPE
Passionate about Port Elizabeth and definitely NOT packing for Perth. Alan's ethos is epitomised in the words of Nelson Mandela; "I have fought against white domination and I have fought against black domination. I have cherished the idea of a democratic and free society. If need be, it is an ideal for which I am prepared to die." See more articles by Alan.